Good Little Boys Don't Lie
by CIF-lover
Summary: Batman finds out Billy's biggest secret and wants him to tell the rest of the Justice League but Billy won't, The two come up with an agreement: if Billy can prove himself as a mischief maker, Batman will let him keep up the lie. Now, Billy must prove himself as a bad boy but how bad can the big red cheese really get? A bit OOC for plot's sake but it should get better.
1. A Gamble

I do not own DC or anything they market. I just thought it would be cute to watch the goody two shoes try to be bad.

* * *

Good Little Boys Don't Lie

Captain Marvel was frozen in time and space unable to even draw a breath. It was a good thing the hero had no need for a constant source of oxygen because if he did, he would be in serious trouble right about now with that substantial shadow looming over him, imposing. Captain Marvel should not be so surprised about this situation. This was what Batman did. He found things out. Batman was Earth's greatest detective. It was pretty much why the hero was chosen to stand beside the otherwise gifted heroes of the Justice League in the beginning.

Right now though, Captain Marvel felt like one of the bad guys. He had been caught in a lie by the Justice League. Batman had a smirk stretching his normally expressionless lips that made even the great hero Captain Marvel, who was gifted with the Courage of Achilles, want to run away screaming for sweet mercy. The dark knight stalked closer to Captain Marvel in the alleyway they were enclosed in making the larger hero feel trapped even with the Zeta transport behind him. Would the rest of the league pop out of there to apprehend him?

"L-look Bat- Batman I can explain." Captain Marvel tried feebly. He knew Batman needed only to press a single button to have the rest of the league sweeping in on their location. They both knew that. Why hadn't the bat done something, anything?

Minutes drew on unrelenting as the Batman slowly crept closer with that unholy sneer on his face. By the time the caped crusader's boots were firmly planted in front of the big red cheese, Captain Marvel was sure the judge had already signed off on his execution and that the axe man was simply here to do his duty. Goodbye Justice League. Goodbye Captain Marvel. Goodbye being a hero.

"Explain?" Batman was actually smiling now in his own quirking of the mouth way. "You are going to explain to me how you are really just a ten year old boy?" Man that was a lucky guess. "William Joseph Batson, average student who misses far too much school and lives with one Dudley H. Dudley in a small walkup at 1432 Binder Blvd. You are four foot two inches weighing only fifty-nine pounds though you and your 'uncle' are trying to remedy that little issue. Your favorite food is pizza with sausage, bacon, and pepperoni. You like all animals but are particularly fond of tigers. You did not ever actually turn in your report on them that was due last Tuesday. Need I go on?" The words left Captain Marvel flabbergasted. Batman knew everything about him!

It took Captain Marvel far too long to locate his mouth on his own body and longer still to figure out how to work the contraption. Batman had not only just witnessed him turning into Captain Marvel from being a ten year old boy but also knew everything about his mortal self. One of Batman's white lenses arched up in question as Captain Marvel tried to figure how he should respond to the older hero. "NO!" Batman's eyes widened slightly at his outburst. "I mean no, Batman. I- what do you want from me?" He continued much more quietly.

"I want you to tell them, all of them, yourself."

* * *

The Watch Tower had never looked so big before to Captain Marvel. Heroes were bustling around looking for leads on what was really going on at project Cadmus. Many were groaning that the Justice League should have known what was really going on there before the sidekicks broke into the building to find out about the genetic engineering going on below the surface. Well, the sidekicks now known as the Young Justice team.

Captain Marvel had wanted to be there when the sidekicks were to be 'inducted' into the Justice League but had been denied since the league only wanted the mentors to be present at the initial entrance. Membership and introductions would come later, Aquaman had been nice enough to tell him when Captain Marvel had questioned about the aquatic hero's protégé.

An alarm sounded and Batman trudged towards the main monitor as though sheer intimidation might make the console rethink its position on the world being in danger. "Looks like that shower will be a problem tomorrow." The bat announced gruffly pulling everyone's attention to him.

Superman flew to his side in seconds. "We'll need a few members to keep the big asteroids at bay. Most look small enough to burn up when they enter the atmosphere but there are at least fifty that could be problematic if they don't change course." By now some other heroes were gathered around as well, looking at the peaceful seeming rocks zooming through space. Captain Marvel noted that the ones nearby were ones that actually could help the situation, other than Batman of course. Wonder Woman, Superman, a Green Lantern, Martian Manhunter, and himself would all be leaguers who could fly into space and take care of the potential threat to Earth's safety.

Wonder Woman's eyes widened when Batman's mathematical notes came up with an answer. "Oh no." She turned to Superman. "You can go right? I can't, I have that charity thing. Can't blow this one off." She did not sound too thrilled about being unable to blow off the charity thing.

The Green Lantern squinted his eyes at the monitor in thought for a moment before mouthing something that looked suspiciously like a curse word before frowning. "Can't we just blow them all up tonight and not worry about it. I can't just leave work tomorrow at noon for a four hour lunch break. My boss is going to get smart to that eventually."

Martian Manhunter regarded the group of heroes stoically. Everyone knew that Superman was supposed to be doing a press conference tomorrow about recent Justice League activity. There was just so much to do. The Martian sighed. "I will do it Batman. I can handle a meteor shower alone."

Superman turned to Captain Marvel. "Can you go Captain? It should only be a couple of hours."

"Sure thing." The words came out before Captain Marvel even had a chance to think about them and Batman's lips twitched for a moment betraying the scowl that wanted to form.

Batman's words were a growl. "Don't you have somewhere important to be tomorrow, Captain Marvel? Maybe something to tell the Justice League about before it becomes a problem."

Captain Marvel knew he was digging his own grave with this one but he couldn't tell the league the truth. He just couldn't. "I uh- don't have a job right now?" Wonder Woman, Green Lantern, and Superman all made puzzled expressions at the admission and Captain Marvel even noticed Green Arrow stop what he was doing to look over. Was being jobless such a big deal with unemployment rates what they were right now?

Superman smiled and nudged Wonder Woman conspiratorially. "You don't think the Wayne foundation has any job openings in Fawcett City do you?"

The heroin broke out in a grin as well, responding. "I'm not sure but I think the CEO will be thinking of expanding there soon if the good captain needs work." Batman growled to cut off the pair's laughter and turned a full force bat glare on Captain Marvel. Wonder Woman wiped the smile off her face and turned back to the monitor. "Then it's settled. Martian Manhunter and Captain Marvel will be posted at the calculated point of impact tomorrow to stave off any potential collisions. Is there anything else we need to consider Batman?"

Captain Marvel had to wonder if the human's glaring capabilities counted as a super power. They sure had him shaking in his boots.

* * *

Captain Marvel probably would have known something was up as soon as he made it to the building but as street wise as Billy Batson was for a ten year old, he did not notice anything was amiss in his apartment building. Honestly, flickering lights were commonplace in the hallways and the only sign anything was wrong would have been just how quiet it was here. There were no sirens wailing tonight or anything of the sort, it was just peaceful in the city and why would a ten year old notice the peace?

Billy pulled out his key ring to let himself into his home so he would not disturb his uncle too much with his entrance. It was only seven forty but most kids would be home by this hour, at least, the ones who had not spent their afternoons meeting with the Justice League to discuss the world's most dyer problems as a whole. Billy walked into the living room with a smile already on his face for his caregiver only to notice the TV oddly enough had some doctor show on rather than Uncle Dudley's regular programs.

The smile fell off of Billy's face as terror clenched at his stomach. His uncle was not sitting in his usual chair though someone was on the sofa. What was going on? "Uncle D?" he questioned timidly.

A quiet frightening chuckle sounded from the other side of the furniture. "Not quite," sang a voice that sounded like a teenager.

"Sh-" Billy began in a panic but was cut off by a large Kevlar gloved hand. Billy closed his eyes tight for a moment to try to will away his panic. It was one word away. Freedom was one word away. Safety was one word away. They couldn't keep him silent forever. He would get out of this and he would save Uncle Dudley.

"You don't want to say that Billy. Not in front of Robin." It was a gravelly voice that was all too familiar to Billy. The hand came away from the boy's face as his blue eyes popped open.

"It's not like I haven't heard cursing before Batman." Robin called from his perch on the back of the couch. Billy had never met Robin before. The sidekick looked older in person than he did in pictures. Billy suspected Batman's protégé might be as much as four or five years older than himself. Robin had a grin on his face as he leaned forward with his elbows on his knees. "Seems kinda young for cursing though. And even younger to be some sort of crime lord. You sure this is the guy we're here to see Batman?"

The man who was holding Billy still drew his attention away from the sidekick when he spoke in his usual gruff voice. "I'm sure he's the one _I'm _here to see, Robin. Go back to watching _House_, this shouldn't take long." Batman looked down at Billy and the kid realized how much smaller he was in this form than his other. It was not just that Captain Marvel was normally bigger than Batman but that Billy barely made it halfway up the man's chest.

Billy Batson might normally be afraid of Batman but he had no time for silly fears of a hero that wouldn't really hurt him. "Where's Uncle Dudley?" He demanded.

Robin laughed. "Wow, he sure has some spunk Batman. Where'd you find this kid anyway?"

"Go back to your show Robin!" Batman growled making Robin turn around and fall to sit properly on the couch and watch the show. The bat glared down at Billy a moment before the white lenses seemed to soften a bit. "Your guardian is fine Billy. Robin just hit him with some knock out gas. He should be on his feet as normal in the morning."

Billy relaxed in the man's grip. Batman did not hurt innocent people. He wouldn't hurt Uncle Dudley. Billy just hoped the dark knight was not going to hurt him either. "Why are you here Batman?" The dark hero released him and moved to sit at the flimsy card table in the kitchen.

Billy followed and sat across from him and as he sat, Batman answered. "I want to know why you didn't tell them."

Billy glanced at the boy wonder who was laughing at the doctors on TV. "I don't want to tell them. Everyone is allowed to keep their identities secret if they want to. I don't want them to know."

Billy wondered if it took effort for the dark hero to keep from scowling for so long but Batman's expression remained relatively soft when he continued speaking. "I am not asking you to tell them who you are just your age. They should know how old you are. You should be in school tomorrow not saving the world from a meteor shower."

Billy straightened his back. It took him a lot less time to come up with an argument than he thought it would. "My age is part of who I am. I should be able to keep it to myself if I want to."

Batman's lips quirked slightly but the small change in expression worried Billy even though the dark knight's lenses remained normal. "It is something the league should know. You will not have to give out your name. They wouldn't be able to track you anyway. There are plenty of children in Fawcett City. You don't even have to tell them your exact date of birth, just that you are still in school."

"I don't want to tell them Batman."

Batman's expression did not change. "Then you'll just keep lying to the Justice League?"

"Yes." Billy was glad his voice sounded so much more certain than he felt with Batman sitting at his kitchen table interrogating him.

Batman outright smiled at him and it made Billy squirm under the hard man's gaze. "Good little boys shouldn't lie Billy."

Billy leaned back on his chair and tried to look cool like the kids in class who always got detention for talking back to the teacher and putting chalk in the eraser and stuff. "So? Who ever said I was a good boy?"

The ledge above one of Batman's white lenses arched up making one of the bat's eyes look larger than the other. "Billy." The man began seriously. "We both know you are a good kid."

Billy huffed and crossed his arms childishly. "I could be bad if wanted." The boy tensed as Batman actually chuckled. "I could!"

The Batman's grin was something Billy knew he could never unsee. The words that the man uttered were a challenge, something Billy would not, could not back down from.

"Billy Batson, the bad boy. Now that is something I would love to see."


	2. Trials With Glue

Trials with Glue.

"C'mon Billy. Batman gave you a chance so don't blow it. All it takes is one really bad-" Billy grinned. "I think I just found how to prove I'm bad boy." Batman had told him that if he could prove himself a bad boy, then he would be able to choose when he'd tell the other heroes that he was Captain Marvel. Never, was of course first choice but when he became an adult maybe he might tell the others so they don't try throwing a retirement party for him and Batman on the same day.

Billy grabbed the preferred tool for his crime from his locker and filed into class with the rest of the students. If he was lucky, he might even get suspended for this and get sent home before lunch. He might not even have to skip out of class this afternoon to save the world. The baddest bad child superhero in the world propped his feet up on his desk getting raised eyebrows from other students before putting his ingenious plan into action.

* * *

Mrs. Mackin walked into her classroom and forced her hand down from her tired eyes so the class would not suspect the headache brewing between her temples. She really hated all the extra work that came with the beginning of the school year but it had to be done and when it was, she could finally rest long enough to breathe. She froze behind her desk and noticed a boy in the third row with his feet up on his desk. She glanced at her roster to find William (Billy) Batson was his name. She had not put a dash by his name so she knew he had not been one of the troublemakers from last week. She wracked her mind but could only come up with times where the boy was perfectly behaved and polite since she met him.

She sighed before announcing. "We do not rest our feet on our desks in this class." That position couldn't be comfortable in those tiny desks. The boy made no sign of hearing her and just continued to stare at her expectantly as the rest of the class shot him nervous glances. "Billy, put your feet on the floor."

Grumbling, the boy swung his legs down awkwardly and kicked for a moment or two before raising his hand. "Miss M! My legs aren't long enough for my feet to touch the floor… You want me to stand up?" Mrs. Makin groaned before bringing her hand back to her head. Of course Billy had to choose today to act up.

* * *

By math, Billy's plan was going perfectly but he couldn't make himself feel good about it. Mrs. Mackin was looking more and more like she just wanted to crawl under her desk and go to sleep. Billy knew that being bad meant… well, being bad but he had not expected all of the guilt that came with it. He could not stop though. He had to prove he could do this to Batman. He just had to!

With a new resolve, Billy pulled out his accessory to crime and pulled the cap off only getting a little of the substance inside the container on his hands at the action. Billy contemplated the glue for a long minute before convincing himself he could do what he was planning. He had heard that older kids got into trouble for sniffing glue and sharpies at school. If they could do it, so could he.

* * *

It was hard to ignore a kid huffing paste during a math test but Billy wasn't going to get any kind of high from Elmer's school glue. She didn't understand what had changed in her student but she knew a child crying out for help when she saw them. She would just have a talk with Billy after class today. That would be it. She would consult Billy and see about arranging a parent-teacher conference if it was a major issue. She pulled out a post-it note jotting down to talk to Billy after class today before seeing Kara trying to copy Robbie's answers. "Eyes on your own papers." She reprimanded making the girl's eyes snap back where they should be. She loved it when the fifth graders would listen to what she said. She just hoped she could get Billy to straighten back out again.

Mrs. Mackin rose up from her seat to make her rounds of the classroom and inconspicuously snatched the paste from Billy's hands along with the cap for the container. As she screwed the cap back on, she continued her nonchalant trek to check the students' progress before putting the glue on the edge of her desk when she sat back down. She had heard other teachers talking before. Billy Batson was a good kid even if he did have the tendency to skip and get spacy. She had never heard of him being disobedient.

* * *

It was eleven thirty by the time lunch rolled around in Fawcett Elementary School and Billy was practically bouncing with pent up energy by the time the class was dismissed to make their way to the cafeteria. First, Billy rescued his partner in crime then he dashed from the room before his teacher could notice the classroom supply was missing from her desk.

Billy tossed his prize in the air and caught it on its descent. He waltzed out of the hallway's big double doors and made his way to the playground, knowing that the meteor shower would be entering Earth's atmosphere in less than an hour. Once outside, Billy began tossing the glue higher and higher adding in a little flick of the wrist so the bottle would flip and twirl before coming back down to land in his hand. He made his way over to the tall bushes near the jungle gym and threw the bottle up into the air more forcefully, "Shazam!" Lightning struck him jolting every nerve of his body awake as he transformed into Captain Marvel.

Captain Marvel raced up to catch his tool of crime before tossing it in the air one more time and stumbling in midair as his big fingers almost fumbled the catch. The red clad hero glanced around the playground before knocking the glue against his head. "Stupid. Stupid. Stupid! C'mon Cap, you of all people should be able to catch a bottle of glue." With that, Captain Marvel blasted off into the sky to fly to the meeting place for his mission.

Breaking up meteors while they barrel towards Earth was something akin to being trapped in a batting cage with the machine turned on ultra-destroyer mode with only your fists to protect you. There was a reason only certain members of the league were chosen for things like this. Quite frankly, it was because everyone else would get squished like the PB and J still stashed between his Math and English books in his locker at school. If one of the humans could somehow try to do this, the rest of the league would probably have to be on scene in a matter of hours to scrape the remains off of the face of the Earth.

Captain Marvel tried not to imagine what the other leaguers' guts would look like splattered all over Mount Rushmore as he and Martian Manhunter worked on breaking up all of the biggest rocks hurtling towards the planet. He was the first defense, flying full speed with arms stretched out in fists before him to ram the huge chucks of stone, breaking them into smaller boulders that would never make it through the atmosphere, let alone to the ground. Even Captain Marvel was kind of confused about how that worked. Rocks aren't flammable but somehow they burned upon entry to the atmosphere? It did not really need to make sense for Captain Marvel to do his job though.

After a few hours of whack a rock, Batman called them from the Watch Tower to announce that the remaining meteors were nothing to worry over. He instructed them to fly into the base for debriefing. Captain Marvel pulled his glue from where he stashed it in his golden sash and let a grin form on his face while running through the details of his next diabolical plan. There was no way Batman could call him a good boy after this one. The kids he had talked to about it had sworn to it at least earning the perpetrator detention every time it was used and he figure detention in school meant more than bad behavior in the Justice League.

An impromptu meeting of willing leaguers was the perfect opportunity for Billy to prove his undeniable badness to Batman. It was great. All Captain Marvel had to do was sit in his seat and feign disinterest as the other leaguers entered the conference room. Today Wonder Woman was talking to Black Canary about some weird girl thing called feminism. Captain Marvel could hear the whole thing because the blonde was sitting right next to him. Leaguers were pretty much ranked by when they joined the league and since Green Lantern was not coming to this little get together, Black Canary was sitting next to Captain Marvel.

A few other members filed in with Batman and Captain Marvel straightened as the bat held his gaze seconds longer than he should have before signaling to the assembled members that the meeting would start soon. Captain Marvel could not fight the smile creeping up on his face as he noticed his plan falling perfectly into place. Superman was not here so Batman would be in the league leader's position in the center of the table.

Wonder Woman stood and excused herself from her conversation before sauntering over to Batman looking anything but pleased. Girls sure could be weird sometimes. Batman replied without expression to all of her comments but to one thing she said, his lenses widened just a bit. In the end, Wonder Woman gave the dark knight a wild grin before reining it in to calmness as the bat gestured her towards the table. Captain Marvel's jaw dropped. To the league leader's chair! Batman sat where Wonder Woman would normally be posted without expression or comment and Captain Marvel could feel his heart racing faster than the Flash ever could as Wonder Woman sank into her seat.

Wonder Woman was on her feet in an instant exclaiming. "Holy Hera! What the-?" The heroin lifted the glue bottle Captain Marvel had left as a trap for Batman and inspected it curiously before shooting confused glances at the assembled Justice League members. "What is the meaning of this?" She shook the dented bottle at Batman looking for answers.

Batman took the proffered item and looked it over before spreading his scrutiny across everyone seated at the table equally though Captain Marvel knew the look was meant for him. Batman gave a minuscule shrug that barely rustled his cape before setting the bottle on the table. "Looks like someone was trying out a children's prank. It's nothing to worry about, just a bottle of glue."

The Flash gave a great guffaw at that. "Come on Batsy! A prank? Any ten year old would know you at least have to take the glue out of the bottle to glue someone to a chair. Someone must've just forgotten it here." The speedster was still giggling even with Wonder Woman's glare ready to slice him to itty bitty bits.

"Is that a confession Speedy?" The Amazonian Princess sneered.

Flash wiped the grin off his face. "Oh come on! Speedy is Green Arrow's sidekick. Don't start calling me that Diana."

Batman took the distraction provided by the two other founders to lift the glue back up in a gloved hand. He examined the container for a moment before arching a brow at the frowning Captain Marvel in question. Really, how was he supposed to know that the glue was supposed to be out of the bottle for the prank? It wasn't like he was- No, Billy had to prove himself as a bad boy. He needed to learn all the ins and outs of childhood villainy. He pursed his lips as Batman let out the briefest of smiles in his direction. Did Batman somehow know about the prank before Wonder Woman sat there? Captain Marvel was just going to have to get more clever.

* * *

On his bed when he got home that night, Billy spied something he had not placed there with his tired blue eyes. A brand new bottle of Elmer's sat on his pillow with a note nestled safely beneath its weight.

_Don't even try that trick again. Even if you do it correctly, it doesn't make the cut._

_P.S.: You cannot get high from huffing nontoxic children's glue. Nice try though._

* * *

Alright, so... This story will probably be posted sporadically from here because I am by no means a bad boy. I have trouble even thinking of bad things to do but the image of little Billy Batson huffing nontoxic glue was just something I HAD to share with the world. If anyone has any requests of bad things they would like to see Billy try his hand in, tell me. Until I come up with more ideas for this fanfiction, it is on hold. Thanks for reading. Hope you enjoyed it.

Oh yes~ I nearly forgot to give credit because credit is due. Latoreia is the one who put the image of a smushed sandwich in my mind so you have that talented writer to thank for the sandwich comment. :3


	3. Easter Special

I do not own Young Justice or any random quotes I shoved in here. Nor do I know many Easter traditions.

* * *

Easter Special

Batman… Yes, Batman. The man did not need to remind himself who he was but he felt like he would have to remind his ward. Yes, his ward. "I'm the Easter Robin!" He would also have to remind the pastel colored boy what was considered appropriate behavior. Robin was currently wearing a pink mask that did not quite match his pale red orange tunic over a pair of faded blue jeans. At least his protégé had remembered to wear his utility belt.

Batman watched the boy run around the estate 'laying his eggs' and allowed himself a small smile. How could a thirteen year old boy come to dictate his life so much? He was the Wayne heir after all. Bruce did not mind it this time, at least not at the moment. Despite his loner tendencies, even Batman knew he needed socialization. Robin had arranged for such. He was such a… special child. Maybe Bruce needed to get Dick checked up on, professionally. He was no longer certain Black Canary's counseling was cutting it for the teen heroes of the Young Justice team.

Robin flounced back to his mentors side and placed a bright blue plastic egg on his head with an exaggerated flourish. "_And_~ there!" The boy beamed up at his father figure as Alfred approached from behind with all sorts of Robin's shenanigans adorning him. Batman needed no more proof that his ward was officially stir crazy. He was glad there would be someone else to take the boy's mind off of things soon. That last mission had definitely done something far too damaging to Robin. "You ready for some fun Alfred?"

"As always sir." The butler gave a tight but friendly smile to the boy who had been through so much. They both knew that Dick was recovering from the brain blast he had received on a mission just two days ago. They would do just about anything to see that the boy did not break down in tears again or hole himself up in his room for an indefinite amount of time.

The child grinning up at Alfred Pennyworth looked anything but shaken by reliving the most traumatizing events in his life all over again in a very condensed four hours. He looked so much like the normal Richard Grayson that Batman was almost shocked at what came out of the boy's mouth. "You think Mom and Dad will come by for the party?"

Another side effect Simon had left as present for Robin's care takers. They had to reconvince the boy of his parents' tragic deaths. Bruce was glad he beat his oldest friend to answering the boy. "Not today Dick. They are too far away to make it this Easter." There was no reason to crush the boy again when he was having such fun. They had been at it for two days already, Robin deserved a break.

Alfred turned to Batman as Robin began pulling plastic Easter grass from his utility belt. "Your guests are due to arrive in fifteen minutes sir."

"Oh, I'm sorry! Am I too early Batman?"

Dick threw the plastic streamers at the intruder calling out, "Holy kryptonite Batman, its Superman!" Clark took the display in stride though and turned instead to take in what the caped crusader was wearing.

"Don't ask." Bruce warned and glared as the Kryptonian smiled. He just had to keep reminding himself that this was for Dick.

* * *

Dick couldn't help his sadness that his parents hadn't come home yet. He kept having those horrible nightmares of their rigging coming loose during a performance and everyone he knew kept insisting they were dead but he knew better. They couldn't be dead.

"Hey. You okay Rob?" The boy looked over to the red headed boy that claimed they were best friends. He remembered Wally West and all the good times they'd had together but he was still having trouble making sense of the information. He did not have a single memory of Kid Flash with his parents.

Why was this thing so itchy and annoying? Dick's hand flew up to the mask on his face only to be caught by a powerful grip. "You know you can't take that off." Connor reminded Dick not for the first time. Why couldn't he expose his true identity? Everyone else did it.

Dick turned to the bigger boy. "Yeah, yeah." He remembered so many things that did not quite make sense. Why was he staying with Bruce? He should be out performing with the troop. He was one of the Flying Graysons after all.

Robin looked over his friends, his eyes snagging on a certain girl. Zatanna. Her lips quirked into a smile which Dick's eyes followed greedily. He could remember much of the girl but not- "So, Zee, wanna meet my parents when they come back from the tour?" She looked hurt. Why would his girlfriend not want to meet his family? He frowned at the thought.

Kaldur laid a hand on his shoulder and said. "Robin, your parents are dead. They have been so since I met you. I am-" The fishboy did not get a chance to finish his lies. Dick was on his feet in an instant, already having slugged him and ready to inflict more pain for the slander Aqualad was spreading.

"Rob! Dude, stop!" The speedster had his arms wrapped around Dick's with the smaller boy's appendages pinned to his back faster than Robin could imagine. Soon Superboy was holding him back by his front too as Dick's and Kaldur's girlfriends helped the fish lipped liar to his feet.

Robin did not give up easily. Though there were two super powered teens holding him, he still struggled in their hold to wail more on the bleeding boy. Now Zatanna was cleaning his scaly face and smiling consolingly at him, the other boy! She was helping the boy who was lying to hurt him! "Let me go! I gonna kill HIM!" Dick hated Kaldur'ahm. He never remembered the boy to lie before but now it was all he did. All the filthy fish-man did was lie and try to steal Dick's girlfriend from him. Robin would kill him!

* * *

Billy was so nervous as he flew to Gotham. He had gotten this invitation from Batman but Easter egg hunts did not really seem like the league's style. Even as Cap, the boy was tired. He had spent all of his spring break so far locked in battle. He had not even gotten a chance to get back to the Watch Tower to check up on things before trying to show up at Batman's holiday party. Those words barely fit together in his mind. Batman throwing a party? It was unnatural. It was creepy. It had to be a trap.

Billy wouldn't fall into it blind though. No, Captain Marvel had a plan, a perfectly evil sinister plan that would once and for all prove Billy Batson as the bad boy he really was deep down inside. Billy clutched a real weapon to his chest and wondered if there would be a good place to hide it at the party. He did not want anyone to get hurt but he really did want Batman to see how deviously wicked he could be when he wanted.

Captain came upon the party of heroes, league and team alike, but did not join in the festivities right away. First, he surveyed the area. There! A chocolate fountain settled between the Young Justice team and a few of the founders gathered would be the perfect target. The big red cheese slid down, hoping he was relatively unnoticed thus far and began setting up his latest vicious prank.

* * *

Bruce frowned up at the air as Captain Marvel flew towards the party. He had hoped Billy would be back home in time to make the party but surely a child would be exhausted after all of that fighting even one bestowed with the powers of Shazam. The young league member was not his priority though. Batman's cowl swiveled over to Robin and the rest of the Young Justice team standing around talking. His lenses zoomed in. Everyone looked upset but that was how most felt about Dick's recent mental issues. The boy would get upset if they told him anything true about his life but everyone was just trying to rehabilitate the young crime fighter the best they could.

Wonder Woman had not noticed the tension in his ward or the other teens and went on with the conversation. "I just don't understand why one would want to roll something on the ground that they intend to eat. How does that make sense?" The Amazonian was dressed casually in a lilac skirt and blouse that actually went very well with her complexion.

J'onn raised a brow at Clark who looked like he was having trouble floundering around the topic without the dark human's help. Superman was fully suited up for this event, mostly because Dick was an enormous fan of his and that the boy lit up every time he saw certain heroes. Clark frowned with a crinkled brow showing his concentration. "I uh… My family didn't do the egg rollin' thing. That's a European tradition. We just did the normal stuff like egg dyin' and chocolate Easter bunnies." Bruce felt like laughing as the conversation looped once again to the common United States' traditions.

Just as before, this got another bout of confused questions from Diana. "You still haven't explained the meaning behind altering the eggs colors! Do the different dyes signify certain things? It seems to be a common theme of Earth things. What color represents love?"

Bruce kept his eyes on his ward's conversation but he was far from absent from his own. "The colors don't really mean anything anymore. The eggs used to be dyed red for religious aspects of the holiday but that tradition has died off on this continent for the most part. The red symbolized blood." That should be enough for the heroin to chew on for now. Batman was having trouble with heroes getting in the way of his Robin.

Suddenly, the boy wonder lunged at Aqualad, knocking the Atlantean down with a solid punch before Kid Flash could manage to catch the younger teen. Superboy was quickly on scene as well but Bruce still made his move to approach the group of kids. Robin was still struggling in his friends' hold. The boy would probably have to be removed from the party. "Robin!" Batman yelled as his ward broke from the two other boys' holds.

Batman was almost halfway to the squabble when a large form stepped into his path. "Batman?" Captain Marvel asked with shock painted across his face before looking distinctly panicked. "Batman!" Suddenly, Bruce was knocked down by the child hero and a loud explosion rang out over the party. The dark knight felt warm thick liquid shoot across his face and feared the worst. Captain Marvel separated their bodies slowly with a wince and Batman wondered if his vision was impaired. Why was there something dark brown all over the Captain? That wasn't blood, it was- "Oh my God Batman, are you okay?"

A familiar laugh overtook the whole party making Bruce wonder what the hell was going on. He stood and turned in shock back to his madly giggling ward just as the boy threw his head back in another guffaw. "Batman!" Robin called before doubling over with more laughter. "Bat-" Whatever the boy had to say just wasn't coming out. "B-ba-b- hehehehee!"

Bruce just stared like the rest of them as the pastel colored bird giggle and shook. Soon Captain Marvel was nudging Batman's arm, "What's wrong with Rob and why are you dressed like that?" Batman glared at the other 'man' and he could hear Robin's cackles rise.

Dick approached, still giggling. "Bat- Batman, you dressed up as the Easter bunny for me?" The boy's cheeks were flushed from all of his disbelieving laughter and his friends were gathered behind him tentatively. The pastel colored bird wrapped his wings around his father. "You are so awesome! Thanks Bats."

Captain Marvel was standing by awkwardly, "Um, did I miss something?"

Batman turned to him with a stern expression as he put an arm on his ward's shoulders. "Only that," he gestured at the destroyed fountain, "that does not prove anything."

Dick stopped fiddling with the bunny sticker he'd slapped over the bat symbol this morning before leaning back to straighten the previously white rabbit ears that were attached to the bat's cowl. "Please tell me we've got another pair of these. I have to get pictures of the Bunny-man." Bruce almost felt like smiling at the chocolate splattered boy he'd taken in. Dick was finally acting like himself. Bruce would give the kid a final test and then- and then they'd see what happened after.

* * *

Billy smiled over at Robin as the team munched on their chocolate eggs. In fact, everyone was enjoying the fruits of their labors. Everything was exact as only Batman and Robin could achieve. Each hero had a set number of eggs colored differently for each individual heroes' costumes, more for the speedsters for obvious reasons but the real trick was finding your own eggs. The best hid egg was one of Superman's that the dark knight had managed to attach to the Kryptonian's cape without his knowledge. Captain Marvel had laughed with the others as Superman tore up the whole party trying to find the single egg everyone else saw and told him he'd missed. It was only fair to give the Kryptonian a trick egg like that, the man had X-ray vision after all.

Robin glanced back over at the decorated Batman once more and gave a brief chuckle. Billy himself could not believe Batman was wearing that. There was even a small cotton tail attached to the man's butt now that the dynamic duo had returned to the party. Rob turned back to Captain Marvel with lines from where his mask was earlier crinkling on his face as he smiled with his shades shining in the sun. "Totally aster save dude. How'd you know I just needed to be shocked back into reality?"

Captain Marvel gave a shrug. "Oh you know, Wisdom of Solomon and all." Billy had not even known Rob had been brain blasted. Captain Marvel had been busy with Black Adam and other miscellaneous villains since the boy lost his mind. "You're feeling better right?"

Robin chuckled, "Yeah, I'm better. Can't say I'm feeling all that turbed about what happened though. I still can't believe I hit Aqualad."

Artemis grinned. "It was a good one too."

Kaldur groaned at that. "Let us please not relive it."

Rob's smile fell from his face as his gaze landed back on the Atlantean's swelling bruise. "Really sorry about that Kal."

The blond boy nudged his friend lightly. "It was a cheap shot." The boy wonder's grin was back now with it mirrored three fold on Aqualad, Kid Flash, and even Red Arrow's faces.

Robin nodded. "Yeah, yeah. You'll get me back." They both chuckled.

"Everyone participating in the egg jarping contest please come forward to claim your egg." Batman's voice rang out loudly cutting off all conversation.

Billy had never heard of egg jarping before but it sure sounded fun. Captain Marvel flew over to the eggs and chose a bright red dyed egg which Wonder Woman pursed her lips at as she selected a pale pink one. Robin was there quickly, picking up a pale blue egg akin to his name sake's. Rules were announced in a similar fashion to the game itself. "This is a modified traditional Easter game combining the classic egg roll and egg tapping. Everyone is to select a single egg and a mallet to roll it around with. The object of the game is to break all of the opponents' eggs by striking them with your own. If you break your own or another player's egg with your mallet, you are disqualified. If you break an opponent's egg with your mallet and yours is still intact, the other player receives your egg to play with as their own. Proceed."

Billy looked down at his bright red egg nestled in a sea of nicely cut grass as he heard Wally laughing. The speedster was hunched over his own mallet with a red-orange striped yellow egg. "Okay Cap, you can do this." Billy told himself as he knocked his egg gently along the grass towards the speedster's. When the red egg rolled in to knock the striped one away a few inches, the speedster looked up with challenge shining in his eyes.

"Oh this will be a piece of cake for a speedster." Kid Flash said with a smile. "You see? It's all about pushing the eggs and building momentum in it with less immediate strain on the shell. Flash and I can do it faster and better than any of the rest of you. See?" Billy didn't see. All he saw was the striped shell break apart as Wally whacked it with a mallet before it came crashing into his own egg. Wally looked horrified but all Captain Marvel could muster up was a chuckle at the absurdity of it. There Wally was saying something insanely smart only to have it blow up in his face at the first swing. Billy couldn't even mourn for his egg. He merely bent down to retrieve the two hard boiled and dyed foods before handing the speedster his cracked egg. Wally's face cracked into a small smile. "As I was saying, I just really wanted to get busy eating my egg."

Captain Marvel shook his head with a smile. "Sure thing Wally, that was just what you were saying."

"Wanna watch the rest with me?" The speedster had already eaten his egg and now had an armful of candies and more dyed eggs to consume. Billy nodded eagerly and that was how he found himself with Kid Flash, mocking the players in a way he did not even remotely understand.

"Hunununununununun!" The pair would say bringing on the Batglare before they shut up. The dark knight turned back to his vibrant yellow egg and they started again. "Hununununununun." The cowled head snapped back up to silence them and Wonder Woman's pink egg came crashing in to break the yellow one.

"Haha! My egg of love triumphs over even the dark knight's egg of brooding." The heroin announced to many applause from the on lookers. Most heroes with super strength had broken their eggs in ways similar to how Wally and Barry did but Wonder Woman was doing surprisingly well in the game so far. She hefted her mallet up in one arm in the victory of a battle well won as she looked around for her next target.

Batman stooped down to collect his egg before pitching it at the younger speedster who just grinned before digging in on the broken foodstuff. Captain Marvel followed Wonder Woman as she guided her egg somewhat expertly to more of the crowds huddled in around what action remained. Here Aquaman and John Stewart were tapping their eggs to collide again and again hoping the other would just break already. The Green Lantern had started with a green one that Billy could remember but it must have been broken by someone's mallet because now he was playing with a bright orange egg. Aquaman's was a pretty sea blue of course and it seemed neither was breaking.

Wally was by his side in a moment, starting their insane mantra. "Hunununununununun" Both men turned to the noisy spectators just as a pale pink egg crashed into the ocean hued one silencing both boys with a dull cracking noise. Aquaman's eyes widened as Green Lantern smiled. It turned out that the egg had cracked taking the sea king's egg with it in disqualification. Billy was surprised at how hard of a glare Aquaman had sent the imposing woman. Green Lantern just tapped away his orange prize smugly, with many spectators on his trail including the two leaguers now munching on their eggs.

An uproar arose drawing Batman like a flame. "M'gann is cheating!" Black Canary accused with a vehemence more suited to the battle ground than a holiday game involving eggs.

Batman took control. "How so?"

Martian Manhunter came to the woman's aid as Green Lantern stood protectively over his egg to watch. "We believe she is using telepathy bursts to rupture the opponents eggs while cushioning her own from harm." The male Martian explained as his niece's mouth quirked up in a telltale smile that was more incriminating than not.

Batman turned to Miss Martian. "Is this true?"

"No," her giggle gave away the truth making the bat's brow arch high in fake bemusement. "Okay, yes. It was just for fun though. Black Canary was taking the game way too seriously." The girl handed her egg over to the angry heroin before she became the unfortunate victim of a canary screech. "Sorry Black Canary," she giggled out as Green Arrow cracked up behind her.

Black Canary turned to her boyfriend waving the dark blue dyed food in his face. "I should have known it was you. She only started cheating when you showed up!" The egg came loose from her grasp, leaving the blonde woman staring wide eyed at the cracked egg that somehow managed to get stuck on her boyfriend's nose. Black Canary pointed as her whole form shook with laughter before the spectators joined in as well.

A pretty purple egg rolled into the circle drawing the crowd's attention as Zatanna followed it in with Robin hot on her tail along with most of the rest of the league. "Last egg coming through!" She announced proudly.

"Come on John, just one more egg," Hawkgirl encouraged the Green Lantern as Robin agreed with, "Yeah, just one more egg till you win Zee."

The battle was intense with, "oh's", "ah's", and "Hunununununununun's". Orange clashed with purple only for purple to retaliate with a strike of its own. The crowd would cheer at every harder hit only to quiet as the players readied for the next strike. It could have gone on forever for all of its riveting entertainment but there had to be a victor and in a particularly strong hit with the mallet, the Green Lantern's shell cracked seconds before rolling into the purple egg and cracking it as well.

The old butler helping with the event strode into the middle of the circle to snatch up the purple egg hoisting it high overhead. "And the winner of the Justice League's first ever egg roll competition is Miss Zatanna Zatara!" Everyone cheered making the girl grin wildly as a blush lightly dusted her fair cheeks.

The prize was wheeled in by Robin, a four foot tall chocolate bunny complete with a bow tied round its neck. The boy wonder snuck in a kiss between congratulations or perhaps the opposite was true. All in all, it was a grand victory for the girl but really everyone had fun and that was all that really mattered.

* * *

Billy tossed his several grocery bags filled with all sorts of treats and Easter games on the kitchen table when he got home and pulled out a miniature of the prize bunny out of one of the bags. It wasn't too mini really. It was a whole foot tall on its own but Billy hid it behind his back as he snuck into the living room where Uncle D was watching some movie. "Happy Easter!" Billy jumped out with his prize, beaming.

The older man smiled and took the proffered chocolate. "Is this for me? Thank you Billy. Did you have fun with your friends?"

"Oh yeah tons of fun! First the fountain exploded, then we went Easter egg hunting-"

"Slow down kid." Uncle D said with a chuckle before pulling out a box from next to him that was once wrapped in light green paper with eggs printed on its side but was now partially unwrapped though the box was closed again. "This came for you earlier. The note says it's from the Easter bat but I couldn't really make sense of any of it."

Billy eagerly tore into the box wondering when Batman had had time to send anything to him during the party. Inside was the soiled pair of bunny rabbit ears, a splattering of chocolate that made it look like a bunny shaped treat might have been slaughtered within, and a note contained in a candy dirtied envelope. Billy opened the letter seeing Uncle D's fingerprints on it from the chocolate in the box and read.

_Billy,_

_Saving people from a chocolate assault does not count as bad behavior. _

_Happy Easter,_

_The Easter-Bat_

Billy was about ready to slam his head against the wall. Who said Batman did not have a sense of humor?

* * *

Happy holidays everyone! This is just for fun, not to be taken seriously and is in no way in chronological order of the story. Hope you enjoyed it.


	4. E for Failure

**Glbdl**

Most assumed Batman lived a spartan lifestyle but regardless of pretenses, sometimes Bruce Wayne could not deny his taste for the finer things in life. Finding a peaceful place to read a good book was always on his list of finer things. So far he had found no venue better suited for reading than space. So on a quiet day when Alfred persistently insisted the billionaire get out of the house for a bit of fresh air, Bruce decided no air could be more suitable than the filtered and recycled air of the Justice League Watch Tower in space.

That was how Batman wound up reading at a window of the Watch Tower recreation room on a Sunday. Things had started quietly enough being a Sunday morning and all but before long, members were trickling in for some relaxing downtime.

It began with Superman and Wonder Woman stopping by for lunch which seemed to be a common occurrence for the two. That bit was fine with Bruce as long as they were elf their voices low enough for the bat to enjoy his book... Only, they did not leave.

Next was Flash who was just zipping in to tune into his hometown's news but the speedy man kept sending Batman both confused and awkward glances that made tension rise all around the room up until the scarlet speedster left.

Things went back to a semblance of normalcy with Flash's departure only to get edgy again as Hawkgirl showed up with Green Lantern in tow. The two of them huddled close on the couch in front of the television to enjoy the latest installment of some ongoing series, whispering to one another and looking nervously around the room like a couple of dating teenagers nervous about their parents watching them over their shoulders. It was nice when they got up even if Shayera was tugging John's arm. Only, they did not leave. The pair settled down together at another table set before the immense windows currently overlooking an almost fully illuminated Earth. They played chess as a pretense but Batman did not need to spend years honing his senses to realize everyone in the room was hear to watch him. Seeing Batman reading a book on base could not be that strange a sight even if it was "The Canterbury Tales".

Still, Bruce Wayne could read with eyes on him so he merely finished the current story and flipped the page to the Wife of Bath's tale. His movement paused as footsteps were heard approaching the Rec room. Eyes were trained on the doorway as was the custom here on base at any time but as Captain Marvel popped in to cross the threshold and plop onto the couch, most everyone went back to their doings, watching Batman read a book.

Once Captain Marvel was seated, he immediately scooped up the remote and began channel surfing. The boy in disguise tossed wary looks about the room and seemed like he was going into shock as he spotted Batman there. The captain sank down on his seat so all Batman could see was a crown of black hair propped up on the armrest.

Now Bruce found reading nearly impossible. Why would Billy try to hide from him in here rather than leaving the room? A couple more channels were flipped before Captain Marvel finally punched in the numbers to bring up a specific channel. Commercials ran a while and the magic wrought man stretched back to catch a glimpse of Batman who was cleverly acting as though he was not observing the boy's every move. Curious blue eyes were pulled away as trailers began to play and the head dipped down out of view to watch whatever movie Billy had found on the movie channels the heroes had all but begged to have up here. Bruce almost went right back to his book but something on screen caught his eye.

A big letter 'R' seemed to take up half the screen and made Bruce feel like his head might explode. Batman shot to his feet as the movie started and brusquely trudged over to the couch just as the other Green Lantern glided into the room to crash on the seat next to Captain Marvel.

"Sweet!" Hal exclaimed throwing his arms back to rest on the top of the couch. "I haven't seen Scary Movie in ages. How long since you've seen it Cap?" Batman froze where he was debating how to make suddenly deciding to pull Captain Marvel out of the room seem less suspicious.

Batman still could not see the magical hero but that did not hinder him from hearing the boy's reply. "I told you before GL, I don't like scary movies so I never watched this one."

Hal leaned forward, pulling his arms to rest somewhere on his lap, explaining, "I already told you. Scary Movie is funny. It's a parody, not some slasher flick so calm down." Hal laughed a bit before pausing the movie just before some stupid busty blonde got shanked to death. "Dude, your face right now- Hold up, I gotta show you something. You look just like this kid on the internet like that!" Green Lantern animatedly fished for the remote to pause the movie and pulled up YouTube on the television with the speed of someone well practiced at using valuable technology for this purpose. "Just watch this." Hal commanded the younger hero and again made himself comfortable where he sat.

The other heroes in the room had focused in on Hal's commotion and now everyone in the room was humoring the Green Lantern's request. Batman figured it would be something asinine but watched anyway for nothing more than a better thought out excuse to extract the child hero from the room so he could not watch inappropriate movies. Words appeared on an otherwise blank screen first.

'The class was asked to write an essay about what they liked about school and why or something the school could improve and how to do it. This is what Billy wrote.'

Batman felt like laughing the instant Billy Batson appeared on screen with his paper, situated in front of his class mates. Captain Marvel's reaction was immediate. He shot up in his seat and nervously looked around the room to see the other heroes watching the television too. The captain slumped back down just as Billy began to read his paper.

"School is great. You can learn and make friends there. You even get to play outside during recess if it isn't- is not raining. There is one thing that I do not like about school through, the grades.

"I get why school has grades but they are very confusing and they don't make sense sometimes. Like how regular grades are the first four letters of the alphabet in order then the fifth grade skips to the sixth letter of the alphabet instead of the fifth. I think F's should be E's because that makes more sense. If this was changed, it would help kids like me understand their grades better.

"The other way we are graded makes even less sense. We are graded on a system of E's, S's, and U's in that order from good to bad. I don't like this because E's remind me of Uncle E. and he was not good so why should E mean a good grade. I think S's should be good cause Superman wears an S and he is good. I think U's should be replaced with Q's because they are the hardest letter to remember how to write in cursive and that's bad.

"In conclusion, I find the grade scale at school to be confusing. I think it should be changed cause when I was younger I wasn't sure what any of the letters even meant. If the school changes the letters it will help kids like me learn better. So I think the grade scale should be changed."

Hal Jordan roared with a hearty guffaw drawing Batman near to see Captain Marvel with his reddened face propped up in his hands. Batman really did not know how to handle this situation but the movie was still suspended so the Green Lantern could at least get his giggles out. Something came whizzing through the air and Bruce dodged effortlessly leaving Hal to take a chess piece wound to the head.

"Ow!"

"Serves you right for laughing at children trying to learn." Hawkgirl scolded.

The pained man scoffed as he turned to face the other heroes in the room. "I wasn't laughing at the kid. I was laughing at what he said." Noticing that the Thanagarian was poised with the black bishop for another strike, Hal threw up his arms and amended, "I mean, I was laughing at how much he looks like Captain Marvel." Said hero scowled up at the defensive man. "Hey, that wasn't your kid or something, was it Cap?"

"Are you saying you never thought the grading system in schools was strange?" The red faced hero gritted out trying to act like nothing was bothering him.

Hal snickered a bit more. "No. That's stupid."

"You're stupid!" Captain Marvel thundered before stomping out of the room making the other heroes dumbfoundedly look to each other for explanations.

"What was that all about?" Hal asked first.

Diana glanced around the room, puzzled, "Is it true that the grading scale skips a letter of the alphabet?" She questioned.

John took a break in returning all of his chess pieces to their starting positions to answer the easier question. "Yes, they bypass E and go straight to F for grading."

Wonder Woman gave an unsure nod before shaking her head vigorously. "And why do they do this Jordan?" She pointedly asked receiving a shrug from the man.

"Dunno, cause E's a good grade on the other scale?" The man hazarded.

"The F stands for failure Diana," Superman helpfully supplied bringing a smile and another nod to her head.

"So what I am to understand is," she summed up, "the child we just watched was more observant than a Justice League member who mocked his curiosity."

* * *

Billy should have known Uncle D. would find out about the movie. He punched his pillow again, angry at the world for hating him so much. This week was the worst he'd had for a long time. Bad guys got away, he had to read that stupid paper to the class, now it was on the Internet, and he was grounded for conspiring to watch an adult movie. This week was horrible.

The boy turned to get comfortable and watched the rain drip down on the window panes. He loved how it obscured his view of the outside while glistening with the orangish streetlight. He closed his eyes, ready to let sleep take him on to the first day of a new week. His brow furrowed making blue eyes peek open once more at the window.

Billy rolled his eyes at his own silliness but something caught his gaze. He got up and padded quietly to the desk beneath the window to see a note placed neatly over his English book.

'Billy,

Do not let what Green Lantern said get you down. You did very good work. Wonder Woman pointed it out and the others agreed. You are a very bright child.

Do not even try to watch another 'R' rated movie or you will be punished again even if you did not get to be bad.

The Bat

P.S.

E stands for excellent.

S stands for satisfactory.

U stands for unsatisfactory.

F stands for failure and the rest are just alphabetical ratings.

Watch out for slang and contractions in your writing.'

Blue eyes trailed back up to the top to skim his favorite part. Maybe the week wasn't as bad as he though after all.

* * *

Hey guys. My computer broke and I'm moving so my writing might be a little sporadic on messing up for a bit if you are interested in that story. This just sort of came to me after reading part of a parenting book at my cousins house. I have to say thegrading scale had me confused as a child and I felt pretty stupid when I finally figured it out. At

**Least I though about things when I was a kid though. **


End file.
